Friday, December 18, 2015

Fashion Faux Pas: Cat Poop Jewelry



After scouring the internet for some cute Christmas gift ideas, I of course ended up finding something incredibly ridiculous and unacceptable.

What could be more important than adorable holiday gifts? Imitation Cat Poop Jewelry from Rover Wolfe Art Jewelry.

Before I go into how crazy the idea is, I want to give the creator's credit for making sure that it's overly clear that the jewelry is IMITATION cat poop. Because, if you're looking for anything made out of real cat poop, they're not the ones to buy from. Props, guys.

Now onto the actual jewelry...Really??! I have a decent chunk of friends who love cats. I even personally know a couple "crazy cat ladies". None of them would wear this jewelry. Why? Because even if you're obsessed with cats to the point of somehow loving their poop, there is honestly NO WAY to tell that the imitation poop is supposed to be from a cat!!! It just looks like you are literally wearing shit!

I don't know about you, but I certainly don't want to gallivant around town wearing poop accessories.

It's not even a funny idea to give someone as a joke, knowing that they won't wear it. I mean, who wants to get jewelry they can't wear?! No one. Trust me.

I just can't imagine anyone actually wanting these. What would be the point?

If for some ungodly reason you think that wearing imitation crap (get it? hahaha) is a good idea, the site sells the necklace for $17 and the earrings for $22.

Oh, and if you're wondering what the jewelry looks like on, here's a pic from the site of someone wearing the necklace:

 

Tuesday, December 15, 2015

Holiday Gift Guide: Victoria's Secret Pajamas


When I was younger, my mom always bought matching pajamas for herself, my sister, and me to wear on Christmas Eve. It was a super fun tradition because not only did we get to open a gift before Christmas morning, but we also looked so cute in the same sleepwear!

Most of the time, the pajamas my mom picked out were from Victoria's Secret, so of course the quality was great. I recently checked out the site's pajamas just to see what they had to offer this year and I found some gorgeous options. My fave is their Pillowtalk Tank Pajama set. It comes in a bunch of different colors, but personally I'm a fan of the look pictured above.

They look so incredibly comfy and adorable. Yes, you can wear them the night before Christmas, but because they aren't really holiday-themed you can wear them all year long!

Each set comes with PJ pants, a tank top, and a limited edition eye mask. I'm obsessed with eye masks, so that's got me hooked. You can also choose the length of the pants, which is perfect for a short gal like me!

You can purchase the pajamas for $39.50 (it's currently on sale, usually it retails for $54.50--what a deal!!).

So start a fabulous new tradition this year and look great for when Santa stops by!

Sunday, November 15, 2015

Holiday Gift Guide: Hello Kitty PINK Hot Chocolate!


Okay, okay...so maybe this is more of an "Alana's wishlist" post, but quite frankly, this is the most adorable thing I've seen recently and I simply had to share.

If you're one of my regular readers, then you know how crazily obsessed I am with Hello Kitty. It's quite an addiction. Suffice it to say, if a product comes in a Hello Kitty theme, I probably own it. My husband even tends to support this addiction, so I'm probably more obsessed with Hello Kitty than ever before.

So the fact that there is actually Hello Kitty Pink Hot Chocolate out there is, needless to say, something I'm lusting over. I mean, any type of hot chocolate that involves my fave little kitty is something that I'd find awesome. But the fact that it's also PINK?! Well, I almost can't even handle it!

I really do think that any lady in your life, young or old, would absolutely love to find this in their stocking. I really can't imagine anyone who wouldn't want such a cute product.

You can purchase the packets in a set of five for $7.95.

Friday, November 13, 2015

Fashion Faux Pas: Scroguard--a Condom for Your Whole Pelvis!


Yes, I know...the picture above is quite disturbing. This product was actually brought to my attention by my favorite (and only) sister, Jenna-Rose, who knows about my need to see ridiculous things.

So, here it is: The Scroguard. The basic idea? It's
a product developed to reduce skin-to-skin contact in the genital areas that are not covered by a condom. According to the site, it is made to prevent certain STDs:

"Both genital herpes and HPV can spread to your scrotum and pubic region through direct skin-to-skin contact and genital secretions during sex, even from someone who has completely normal looking skin with no visible warts or sores."

While I do commend the company for attempting to help lower the risk of getting an STD, I find this idea to be a bit preposterous.

Honestly, if I were about to bone someone, and he pulled out plastic panties with a hole for his penis, and then threw on a condom, I'd not only be concerned--I'd be freaked out and would immediately get out of that situation.

I really don't know what would be worse: if the guy had the panties on beforehand (during a date), or if he changed into them right before sex. I mean, let's be honest. Even putting a condom on can take up a bit of time. I imagine that putting on the Scroguard, even with the fancy snaps, would also take another large chunk of time. So, it would basically take around five minutes before the guy is ready to bang, which is a turn-off all on its own. But seeing the plastic, diaper-esque, undies would probably be a deal breaker for me, as well as the most absolute turn-off possible.

The site also lists the type of people they think would benefit the most from using the Scroguard:
  • Men with a high sex drive who enjoy sexual variety.
  • Couples and individuals who love to swing.
  • Casual sex partners and committed couples who want peace of mind.
So, it's kind of like a Slutguard...in fact, that'd probably be a better name. And THANK GOD the site gives directions--how would anyone know how to put on plastic panties? From the directions, it's easy to see how confusing this product can be:
Step 1: Before sex, put on Scroguard. Fasten buttons.
Step 2. When ready, put on a condom as you normally do, being sure to tuck the base of the condom inside Scroguard.
Step 3. Make love. After sex, unfasten the two buttons of Scroguard and remove. Then pull the condom off.

Thanks so much, Scroguard! I especially enjoy the instruction to "make love". The customers the site describes don't really seem like the "make love" type. But hey, it sounds classier, so whatevs!

In case you were wondering, you can either dispose the Scroguard, OR wash it and reuse it! Woohoo! I'm sure that's great news as each individual one is about $20. Pretty pricey. I say, get some plastic wrap and just make your own if you're into this idea.

Happy guarding, guys!

That is all.
 

Thursday, November 5, 2015

Who DOESN'T Need a Pet-Holding Hoodie?!


That's right. I'm posting two cat-based blogs in a row. I'm just going to admit it: I'm going through kitten withdrawal. Ever since Cyrus the cat (and his owner, our housemate) moved out, I've been desperately wanting another little animal to snuggle with. Don't get me wrong--I love my husband, and he rocks at snuggling, but there's just something so awesome about having a little kitten lay with you while you watch a movie or something.

Honestly, f I weren't married, I'd be pretty concerned that I was on my way to becoming the "crazy cat lady".

But I digress.

Due to my cat obsession, I stumbled upon this gem: a hoodie with a little pocket that can hold small animals (exactly like a cat, or even a small dog--yippee!!). It's called the Mewgaroo Hoodie, and it's basically a sweatshirt featuring a specially-designed pouch precisely made for keeping dogs, cats or other small pets feeling cozy, safe and close to their owners.

The company that created this spectacular sweatshirt is Unihabitat, a Japanese pet supply company. Okay, so admittedly you'd probably look a bit funny if you were to walk around downtown wearing one of these. Especially since the hoodie isn't just a simple sweatshirt with a pocket. Of course it isn't. It's Japanese, after all.

The Mewgaroo Hoodie takes pet lovin' even further. Much further. Unlike all those, what they call "boring, run-of-the-mill hoodies not made with animals in mind", this sweatshirt also features sewn-on ears and paw pads to complete the proud animal-lover look.

Here's a picture of the sweatshirt on a model to give you an idea of the entire look:





Soooo, yeah...this isn't something I would personally wear out in public. But still, if I were at home with my cute little pet (once I manage to trick my husband into getting one), I can definitely see myself wearing this. In fact, I kind of like the quirkiness that the sweatshirt offers, at least for home use.

But obviously, the real breakthrough with this hoodie is in the pouch. Anticipating that some dogs and cats are prone to shed, the perfectly pet-sized pocket includes a removable lining for easy cleaning. I think that's a great feature.

This sweatshirt seems so well-made and really thought out; I really love it! So where can we all go to buy one??

Well, unfortunately I fell in love with the product before even looking at where I could buy it...The entire product webpage is currently catered only to Japanese-speaking consumers (SO unfair!), so we can only hope that it will soon be available for wider release before too long.

I'll keep all of you fashionistas posted on an international release, which I'm sure will occur before very long, as the product is getting a TON of worldwide media attention.

So, let's all cross our fingers and hope that this is something we can buy before Christmas, and that we'll all be snuggled up with our little furry friends by the new year!

Tuesday, October 27, 2015

Fashion Faux Pas: Cat Pasties


Really? Is THIS what we've come to?!

I originally set out to write about cute cat fashion items because I've recently discovered that I don't hate cats (which is a huge surprise to anyone who knows me). Unfortunately, my search ended with the discovery of these Cat Face Pasties.

First of all, I am beyond disturbed by the picture. The spilled milk, the "sexy" look...and cute little cat faces covering nipples.

After reading the description, I was only more troubled:
These cat face shaped nipple pasties are a great present for any cat lover, be it yourself or someone else! The pasties are made from a leatherette backing which is covered with sequins. The cat's face is made with googly eyes and thread and can be created in black, white, brown or any other colour you feel like, just let me know.

These pasties measure 7cm across. Adhesive is not included however they can be held on with either body tape or simple double sided tape from any stationary shop.


Googly eyes?!?!! Am I crazy, or do people really want to wear googly-eyed pasties? Not only that, I love the fact that the adhesive isn't included. I feel like that's the whole point of pasties (though I am admittedly not an expert)--aren't they specifically made to be ready to stick on your knockers?

So okay, maybe there's a classy way to wear these things. Maybe a dress that's a tiny bit low-cut and a cat pokes out with it's little googly eyes...wait, no. That's still f-ing creepy.

The cat pasties are about $20, as are most of the designer's other pasties. To be fair, not all of her designs are as creepy...but I will never wear googly-eyed cat faces over my nipples.

That is all.

Sunday, October 18, 2015

Don't Be Gross--Clean Your Makeup Brushes!


I'm definitely guilty of using some pretty disgusting makeup brushes in my time. For some reason, it didn't really occur to me that they might need a good cleaning. Then I noticed a bunch of random zits. Now I have crazily dry skin (if you're a regular reader, I'm sure you've read my many rants about it!), so I was pretty confused as to what would cause breakouts. After a little research, I found the problem. And honestly, I had no idea that not cleaning makeup brushes could effect your skin so much!

Now that I'm aware, I'm a little OCD when it comes to having clean brushes. I've found countless articles online with tips and tricks to clean your brushes, but here's what works for me:
  • Begin by running your brushes under lukewarm water and rinse out all of the residual makeup. Try to focus on the actual bristles while avoiding the part of the brush where handle meets the head, as this can loosen the glue over time.
  • Spritz a brush cleaner on your brushes your brushes, Mary Kay has an amazing brush cleaner that I'm currently in love with.
  • Rinse the brush tip under running wateruntil the water runs clear from the brush. You don't want any cleaner left behind!
  • Use a cloth to wipe your brush clean, reshaping the bristles as you go.
  • Lay your brushes flat on a cloth to dry (I usually leave them overnight).
So there you go! After cleaning your brushes, you'll immediately notice a difference in how they work. In fact, a lot of my brushes feel brand new after a cleaning.

If you don't have any makeup brushes, or are looking to purchase a new set, try the Mary Kay Brush Collection. In includes a powder brush, a cheek brush, an eye color brush, an eye crease brush and an eyeliner/eyebrow brush. It also comes with a super cute case.

If you're looking for new brushes as well as a cleaner, Mary Kay's Brush On Beautiful set has just that! It includes all the brushes you need, a pretty cosmetic bag, and their fabulous brush cleaner.

Any of these products are amazing--I absolutely love them. The Brush Cleaner on it's own is $10, the Brush Collection is $55, and the Brush On Beautiful set is $65.  Their brushes are honestly incredible and last practically forever (unlike the cheapo brushes you get at a pharmacy).

So, now that you know how important it is to clean your makeup brushes, get to it! Your skin will thank you.

Wednesday, August 12, 2015

THE Comfiest Skirt Ever--for $9!

So, I have to give credit to my fabulous sister for this one. We were aimlessly wandering around Walmart one day and I was looking for some comfortable, yet cute, bottoms. When we came up to Faded Glory's Fashion Printed Short Knit Skirt, she told me that she owns a few different ones (they come in a ton of colors and patterns), and she highly suggested I give them a try.

So I did. And I'm in love! I could honestly spend every day wearing these skirts.  They're about as comfy as my yoga pants (I know, I know...sounds impossible), but they look absolutely chic and fun, depending on the print and/or color you choose.

The stores seem to be constantly rotating through different designs, which is fine by me! That said, it's definitely a good idea to grab a solid black skirt, as well as a solid grey one to start off with. They can be dressed up or down, depending on the look you're going for, and they look much more expensive than they are.

Also, grab a few different patterns that you like! The pictured skirt comes in a few different colors, and the way that the stripes are placed creates a slimmer shape for anyone who wears it.

Each skirt is only $9, which is probably why I own about ten of 'em! You can purchase them online, but I've just had much better luck in the stores, as far as finding pretty patterns goes.

Either way, once you start wearing them, you'll wonder where the hell they've been all your life--I know that was my reaction!

Happy shopping!

Tuesday, June 30, 2015

Beauty Storage Secret: The Original Pink Box



The Original Pink Box in use!
If you haven't heard of the Original Pink Box, you're not alone. I had absolutely no idea what it was. When I looked it up, it just reminded me of a smaller version of my Dad's old tool box--and rightfully so, since that's basically what it is.

Little did I know that tons of beauty experts have been using this sturdy box to organize their beauty products for years. How was I not aware of this?! It's one of the best ideas ever!

The box is large enough to hold all your beauty loot (even if you have an embarrassingly large collection of 435784954023 different products like I do), yet it doesn't take up a ton of space.

Plus...it's pink. Need I say more?


The Original Pink Box comes with two deep drawers (complete with matching liners--Oooo, fancy!) and a top section so that you can keep your makeup in separate sections. Extra bonus? It also has a lock! Hey, some products can be pricey, so why not keep them safe?

You can also purchase the box in an array of other bright colors and sizes, but trust me when I say that the Original Pink Box is the way to go. It is a little expensive (around $100), but this is definitely something that'll last a long time.

Happy organizing!

Saturday, June 27, 2015

Fashion Faux Pas: WHAT is Going on With This Whole Armpit Hair Thing?!


It started innocently enough. A few hippie chicks ditched their razors and opted to go natural. I honestly have no problem with that--do whatever makes you feel good! What upsets me the most is that women having armpit hair is now a "trend". Yes, just like skinny jeans, the long bob, and countless other normal things.

The model in the picture above is actually quite pretty. That said, I just can't stop looking at her pits! To get a man's point of view, I showed the picture to my fiancé, and he immediately said, "That's gross.", with no prompting.

What's even worse (if you can believe that there is anything worse than growing out strands of armpit hair), is that people are actually dyeing their pit hair bright colors! There are even a bunch of actual tutorials on how to do it! If for some reason I went crazy and decided to stop shaving my armpits, the last thing I'd want to do is draw more attention to them by dyeing them various hues (which are readily available to those who want them).


Don't forget to color coordinate!

I've seen countless articles about how the armpit hair trend is "a huge step for women". I'm all for women's rights, but this is ridiculous. If you want to grow it out simply for yourself, great. If you're trying to make a fashion statement, you're an idiot.

That is all.

Thursday, June 25, 2015

10 Ways We're Ruining Our Hair Without Even Knowing it

When I was younger, I absolutely hated my hair. It was, and I know I've written this before, a pile of wavy, frizz grossness. I didn't know about products for curly-haired girls, and chances are most of them didn't even exist back then. So, I resorted to flat ironing my hair on a regular basis, coloring the heck out of it, and just being all-around mean to my hair.

Now, I've finally learned to embrace my curls (with a ton of styling products thrown in), and only flat iron it a few times a month. But even I still make mistakes.

Here are the top damaging hair mistakes that most of us don't even realize we're making:

1. Not Cleaning Beauty Tools
Dirty utensils--brushes, combs, straighteners, curling irons--recycle grime into fresh, clean hair, which can irritate your scalp and clog pores on your head. and for the love of god, please get rid of those things when they pass their expiration dates (yes, those exist).

2. Spending Too Much Time in the Sun
I always forget this one. You need to apply SPF something-or-other all over every inch of your body and that includes your hair. Certain sprays and leave-in conditioners are loaded with secret sunscreen, so keep an eye out for those on labels.

3. Drying Hair with a Towel

Another one I still have a hard time avoiding... It's a huge no-no for those with big waves or curls to use a towel to dry your hair. Why? Those types of hair are naturally drier than other hair types. The rough fabrics will agitate the cuticles in your hair, causing unnecessary friction (and frizz). Instead, opt for a microfiber towel or cotton T-shirt.

4. Forcing Knots to Come Out
Ditch the skinny little comb--paddle brushes are where it's at. If you're trying to untangle a knot with a comb, there's no flexibility to the tool, which is a real pain for your hair to deal with and it causes breakage. Paddle brushes have a special cushion so that you can gently work to unravel your hair.

5. Eating Poorly
Okay, I'm not exactly great at when it comes to healthy eating (ex: my many McDonald's trips each month), but it's gotta be said: you really are what you put inside your body. Water and vitamins A, C, and E are are vital for your hair to maintain its glossy texture.

6. Pulling Back Sunglasses

You know when you step indoors and pull your shades over your head because, well, you're not outside? Yeah, you're totally killing your follicles. Not only does that pressure from your glasses stress out the hair, but you also risk plucking strands when you step back into sunlight and pull the glasses over your eyes again. Just avoid it.

7. Overwashing
Though it depends on the hair type, chances are you do not need to wash your hair everyday. I wash mine a couple times a week. Plus, you can even train your hair to go along with this--yes, the first couple weeks suck, but in the long run, your hair will thank you.

8. Dyeing Hair Frequently
Surprise, suprise! Something else I do a bunch, although not in a crazy way. Touching up your roots/highlights every four to six weeks is perfectly normal. If you're going every two weeks, just...no. Hair dye chemicals make your head more delicate and fragile to work with.

9. Going Overboard with Dry Shampoo
Yes, dry shampoo has gotten me out of quite a few jams, especially when I feel like crap and need to be somewhere quickly, but don't want to spend the hour it takes to fully wash and style my hair.  That said, too much of the good stuff can leave your hair dull and can even block your scalp's pores, which can cause pimples or cysts.

10. Wearing Tight Hairstyles

I used to wear my ponytails and buns a bit too tightly, just to keep it in place. But even I notices the severe breakage it was causing! I mean, this about it--styles like that are literally pulling the life out of your follicles.

Now go forth and treat your gorgeous hair with some dignity!

Saturday, June 20, 2015

Finally! Shimmer Has Become EXTREME!


Oh lordy. If you even vaguely know me, then you know I'm obsessed with anything containing glitter or shimmer. I even make my own glitter lotion with obscene amounts of loose glitter so I can wear a ton of glitter all over my bod constantly. Honestly? I'd live in glitter, if it was socially acceptable.

So when I saw Physicians Formula had come out with an Extreme Shimmer eye collection, I pretty much has a seizure of delight.

I have to admit, the packaging was what caught my eye first.  I was literally at a drugstore with my fiancĂ©, ran off because I saw something shiny (I know, I know...) in the makeup department, and it was love at first sight.

I've always been a Physicians Formula girl--their products are amazing and though they're on the pricier end of drugstore makeup, they're also quite a bit cheaper than what you'd find at makeup counters in department stores.  The brand really caters to those of us who want great quality in our makeup, but don't want to spend a ridiculous amount of cash on it.

With the new Extreme Shimmer collection (I absolutely love the idea of shimmer somehow being "extreme"), I decided to try out one of the eyeshadow palettes. I went with the nude palette, rather than the smoky one, simply because warmer colors tend to look better on my skin. That said, chances are I'll be purchasing the other one in the very near future.

Since I knew the shimmer was, in fact, probably going to be extreme, I waited to use it for a night out.  Hey, even a shimmer enthusiast like me doesn't bust out too much glitter during the daytime!

I absolutely loved the shadows. The amount of shimmer was perfect--my eyelids didn't look disco ball ish, but they had a distinct shimmery glow to them. Also, since the colors are on the lighter side, it's hard to overdo it. I layered on about four different shades for depth and it still didn't look like I used a ridiculously crazy amount of makeup.

Each fabulous palette is $11.95. You can find it in most drugstores or purchase it online at the Physicians Formula website.

Get your glitter on, gals!

Wednesday, June 17, 2015

Oh Yeah?! Well, I Told My Therapist About You!

I love a good, bitchy tee. Emi Jay has oodles of them, but my absolute favorite is their I Told My Therapist About You Tee.

To me, it seems like the perfect insult--and a heck of a comeback! Plus, you don't even need to say it. Simply wear this top around people you hate (or people you want to confuse), and see how it plays out. It's the best passive aggressive article of clothing I think I've ever seen!

A cute tee like this is actually great to have on hand, humorous statement aside. This is one of those great shirts that you can simply toss over your sports bra, or make it a little fancy with some bold accessories. Either way, it's a fun top.

It's also crazily soft, as are all Emi Jay's tees, and the fitting is a little bit loose and lightweight. Perfect for the super hot days we've been having.

The top comes in three colors: black, grey, and white. Personally, I like it white, as I think it has the most versatility, but hey--it's your call! They're all fabulous. Each one retails for $38.

Happy shopping, ladies!

(Oh, and you can totally tell your therapist about this post).

Monday, June 15, 2015

Fashion Faux Pas: The Return of the Snuggie--Beach Style

Just when I thought we were finally done with the whole Snuggie thing, I stumbled upon this: the Beach Snuggie. It's "the beach towel with sleeves!"...I'm sorry, but this is utterly ridiculous.

First of all, the original Snuggie is nothing more than a backwards bathrobe. Seriously--go grab your bathrobe and throw it on backwards. The result is exactly the same.

As for the beach aspect...it just seems horribly stupid. I get that some people want to stay covered while beachin' it up. My practically translucent Scottish skin hates the sun and I've got a sunburn even as I'm writing this. But there are just so many better options out there! Get a cute cover-up dress! Anything but this!  Hell, if you really want a "beach towel with sleeves", for some crazy reason, just get a terry cloth robe!

In general, the Snuggie has always been in my top five most hated products.  But this takes it to a whole new, and terrifying, level.

Honestly, if I see someone at the beach wearing one of these, chances are I'll flip out.

But, if you feel like taking the chance, or if you're a crazy person, you can get the Beach Snuggie at a bunch of department stores, as well as on Overstock.com for $15.

That is all.

Tuesday, May 26, 2015

Who DOESN'T Want to be a Disney Princess?!

I know that I've mentioned this several times, but wearing trinkets that remind us of our young obsession with princesses never goes out of style. The only rule is to keep it classic. Don't go for the gaudy Cinderella pendant in the Children's department.

Instead, try something like this gorgeous Disney Sterling Silver Cinderella Heel Necklace. It doesn't scream, "I'M A PRINCESS, DAMMIT!!!", but it has just enough to remind you of your fave fairytale.

Even if you're some kind of Disney hater (doubtful if you're reading this blog), this could still be worn as a simple necklace with a heel--maybe for a fashionista out there?

The necklace is incredibly dainty. It's the type of accessory that can be worn constantly and doesn't draw attention away from your outfit. At the same time, it looks a bit glamorous and certainly appears to be more expensive than it actually is.

I posted a pic of myself wearing the necklace on the left--Don't mind my translucently-white skin--It's super pretty, right?! The little heel is just fabulous.

Each necklace retails for $24.99 at Target. Amazing deal, no?

And if you aren't into Cinderella, but still want something Disney-inspired, they've got a whole collection of baubles to choose from.

Happy shopping!

Tuesday, April 28, 2015

Say Goodbye to Chafing with Bandelettes!

No matter what size you are, I'm willing to bet that you've had to deal with thigh chafing. It's uncomfortable and annoying. Bandelettes is a company that specializes in helping with that problem. They sell thigh bands that are as sexy as they are helpful.


I'm the kind of girl who wears dresses and skirts most of the time, especially with spring finally showing up. So it's safe to say that yes, my thighs do chafe, even though I am not overweight. People often think that only severely overweight people have this problem, but in all actuality most of Bandelettes' customers range in size from 4-12. For the majority of women, this is a product that will help you out immensely.

I tried out a pair for myself--the gorgeous Black Onyx ones--and absolutely loved them. Wearing them under my springtime frocks worked perfectly. I didn't have any chafing, the bands stayed put thanks to the silicone they're lined with, and my boyfriend even commented that they looked super cute poking out from underneath my dress when I walked. Huzzah!

So, it gets an A+ in my book.

Bandelettes offers lots of band choices, but they're all gorgeous. I say, buy a few pairs in different colors so that you've got something to wear under anything you might need to. Honestly, these bad boys make the world a better place (at least according to my thighs!)

Each pair is only $15.99, and they seem to last a while--I've been wearing mine on and off for a few weeks and they show no sign of giving up!

Check out their site for some fun options and never deal with thigh chafing again.

Disclosure: This post contains a product sent for review consideration. My priority is to you, and I honor that commitment by being honest! If you have any questions about this, please email me.

Sunday, April 26, 2015

The Look For Less: Structured Backpack


Let my sore shoulders rejoice! Backpacks are finally back in style! If you know me at all, then you know that my purse  practically weighs about five million pounds (give or take), and I always tend to carry it on the same side. I've seen a chiropractor and was told how horrible this was for my back, neck, and shoulders...but alas, fashion came first and I did not listen.

But that's all changed. I can now carry my belongings evenly distributed across my back, and look fabulous!

This season, backpacks are everywhere. Personally, I like a nice, structured bag in a neutral color--I'll simply get more use out of it. But how much cash is this body conscious bag worth?

Pictured above are two nearly identical backpacks with one big difference: price, of course. On the left is Proenza Schouler's PS Courier Small Backpack, which retails for $1,675. Pretty pricey, right?! I'm sure the quality is great, blah blah blah, but even if I had the extra cash to purchase such a bag, chances are I'd use it for a vacation or on a shopping spree at Target. There's got to be a better way! (Spoiler: there is). The bag on the right is the Structured Faux Leather Backpack from Forever 21. It costs a low $33 normally, but is currently on sale for $20. EEEEeeeee!!!

Which bag you buy is up to you, but my advice? When it comes to a trendy fashion accessory, go for the cheaper option. You never know when it'll go out of style, and no one wants to be stuck with a pile of stuff that's outdated.

Happy shopping!


Saturday, April 25, 2015

Sorry, Fashionistas!


I know it's been a ridiculously long time since I've posted. I somehow managed to get some sort of "relapse flu" for a couple weeks, had intense fibromyalgia pain, and had migraines on and off.

So that's my excuse. I know, I know...makeup is more important. Don't fret, ladies! I have TONS of things to write about, including some product reviews and even some fab giveaways coming up.

Stay tuned for the extra sassy fashion posts you know and love!

Thursday, April 2, 2015

Spring Cleaning! When to Throw Out Your Coveted Cosmetic Goodies


With spring in the air, all I want to do is clean! Sorry, that was a complete lie...I hate cleaning, especially when it means I have to get rid of cute clothing/accessories/makeup that I own. Still, it is a good time to go through your makeup supply and decide what needs to go.

Personally, I get fairly attached to a lot of my makeup.  There's a lot of, "Oh, I got that eyeshadow palette as a reward for scoring a new client!", or "That lipstick is from when I finally decided to go red!", going on in my brain.

But that doesn't mean it's okay to keep expired makeup. Not only do cosmetics accumulate tons of bacteria over time, they also simply don't work as well.

As I do every year, I've written up a little guide to assist you ladies with this very sad task. Trust me--I know how emotional it can be, and I fully support having some kind of celebratory ceremony in honor of what you throw out.

Here are the facts broken down:

Lip Color
Your lipsticks and glosses are only good for two years before it’s time to toss them. Any longer than that, and they'll start to look and feel cakey and heavy on your lips. Not flattering.

Mascara
Sadly, mascara is only good for a few months before it’s time to get rid of it. To make it lwork its very best, be sure to pull out the wand in one straight out motion rather than pumping it. Pumping the wand up and down will trap air and bacteria in the tube. After about three months (whether you pump or not) your mascara will start to dry out and become clumpy.

Foundation
Liquid foundations will stay good for about one year and powder for about two years after opening them. After that you will find that it’s lacking in the coverage department. You may notice with older foundations that the color may have started to change a little and look a little yellow or orange.

Blush, Bronzers and Eye Shadow

Depending on the product, you will find that after a year or two (it’s a broad range, I know) you will find that your blushes, bronzers and shadows will begin to harden up and the color won’t go on as smoothly and nicely as it used to. That's your cue to toss it.

Eyeliner
Liquid liner is pretty prone to microbial growth and is it’s smart to treat it the same as mascara--it’s only good for about three months, then it’s time to replace it. A pencil liner on the other hand, can last up to three years (make sure to sharpen it between uses), but it too will eventually become crumbly or stiff.

As for anything else?
If you’re still not sure if your makeup is good or bad (I mean, who really keeps track of how old a tube of lipstick is?) ask yourself these questions:

Does it smell funny? Toss it.

Has the color changed? Toss it.

Has the consistency changed? Toss it.

Hope that helps! And the best thing about throwing out old makeup, is that it makes room for some fun new purchases, which are completely necessary and very important (as far as my boyfriend knows)!

Tuesday, March 31, 2015

Fashion Faux Pas: Bringing Back the Fanny Pack

I got an email a couple years ago asking me to review a "new and revolutionary alternative to handbags" created in London. They were cleverly called "bum bags". Of course they were clearly fanny packs. Well played, London, but I went to school for words and figured out your little code quite quickly. Of course I did not accept the offer at the time, and basically puked at the mere idea of bringing back such an ugly fashion accessory!

Unfortunately, it didn't end there. More and more, I'm seeing stores I usually LOVE selling fanny packs. It is so disappointing.

Yes, I understand that it's handy to throw your essentials in while you're at the beach or whatever. But surely there's something else you can do that doesn't make you look like you've got an extra little fat pouch jutting out of your body! I mean, why would anyone want that?!

Fanny packs are simply not flattering. I don't care if you make them in my fave print (I'm looking at you, Victoria's Secret, and your leopard print design). No matter what you do, the look is still the same! It's touristy, ugly, and just makes you look way less fashionable than you probably are to begin with.

I swear, if I see people sporting these fanny packs, I WILL get violent. There's just no excuse for it.

The fanny pack pictured above is from Victoria's Secret's PINK line--a line I'm usually obsessed with--and it retails for $12.95. Just in case you were wondering.

I only have one request: Stop the fanny pack madness once and for all!!!

Monday, March 30, 2015

Fab Clinique GWP at Macy's!


If you know me at all, then you know I can't go very long without scoping out the latest cosmetic goodies out there. And, of course, I mainly enjoy those that come with a lovely gift with purchase...but who wouldn't?!

Right now, Clinique has a super pretty GWP at Macy's. I'm totally LOVING the makeup bags!

All you have to do is spend $27 on Clinique products and this GWP (valued at $70) is all yours.

Here's what you get:
-Moisture Surge Extended Thirst Relief
-Dramatically Different Moisturizing Lotion+
-Color Duo in your choice of Pinks or Nudes:
(Pinks includes Eye Shadow and Blush compact in Pinks and Duel Ended Different Lipstick in Raspberry Glace and Long Last Glosswear in Kissy Fit)
(Nudes includes Eye Shadow and Blush compact in Nudes and Duel Ended Different Lipstick in Tenderheart and Long Last Glosswear in Sunset)
-High Impact Mascara in Black
-Exclusive Lulu DK cosmetic bag duo


I love when you get some say in what your GWP contains. Personally, I think the pink products are simply perfect for spring, but you can't lose either way. Each item in the set is something that I use on a fairly regular basis, except it's in a mini version. It's great for travel, or if you're a little crazy about makeup like I am, you can throw these products in your "emergency makeup bag" that you have in your purse.

Not sure what to buy to qualify?  Since you'll be getting a bunch of fun makeup, why not try out some fragrances? Macy's has a brand new Limited-Edition Clinique Happy All Around Fragrance set that's great to give as a gift, or keep for yourself! The fragrance trio includes classic Clinique Happy; warm, romantic Clinique Happy Heart; and spring-floral Clinique Happy in Bloom. It retails at $42.

Clinique Happy All Around Fragrance set









Happy shopping!

Sunday, March 29, 2015

Bikini Luxe Necklace GIVEAWAY!


Bejeweled Dainty Necklace
Huzzah! Winter is officially over (even though it is still snowing up here in New England lately, and the temperature isn't really changing...but I'll take what I can get). Thankfully summer is rapidly approaching. I am SO ready!

In my search for awesome summer must-haves, I came across a fab site, Bikini Luxe. In addition to the gorgeous swimwear they've got to offer, the site also caters to ladies who want to dress up their bikinis with accessories.

I've always been the type to pair my swimsuit with a super cute bracelet or earrings. Why not?


I absolutely love that they're on my side with this.

Sassy Fashionista has teamed up with Bikini Luxe for a fantastic giveaway to remind you that summer is really on its way!

The piece we're giving away could honestly be worn year-round, but would look extra cute with one of their swimsuits. We have one Bejeweled Dainty Necklace in sterling silver (a $33 value) to give to a lucky reader!

I'm totally in love with this piece! It goes with virtually any outfit and the size is perfect. The "jewel" is fairly small, so while it does get attention, it also isn't gaudy. It's just perfect.

To enter the giveway, simply send an email to sassyalana@gmail.com with the subject line reading "BIKINI LUXE". The giveaway ends April 5th and the winner will be alerted via email.

Good luck, ladies!

And be sure to check out the Bikini Luxe site for more great products.

Disclosure: This post contains products sent for review & giveaway consideration. My priority is to you, and I honor that commitment by being honest! If you have any questions about this, please email me.

This Just In: I'm Sick!


Sorry, fellow fashionistas, but for the past few weeks I've been dealing with the WORST COLD EVER. I'm still a bit sick, so if my posts sound a little too creative, be aware that it's probably the Robitussin talking.

That said, I do have some fabulous reviews and giveaways coming up, so be sure to check in daily!

For now, I'm off to bed to snuggle with a box of tissues.

Stay sassy!







Thursday, March 19, 2015

The Perfect Beauty Boxes for All Makeup Lovers


Purchasing makeup is honestly one of my favorite hobbies. And before you say anything, YES, buying makeup counts as a hobby! There's just something so magical about opening up a new product and trying it out for the very first time. Specifically, I'm a HUGE fan of beauty kits and sets.  I mean, what's better than one new beauty product? A mini makeup collection, of course!

Memebox knows exactly what I mean. The site offers up some of the most fabulous makeup--and it's all Korean-based (and super gorgeous!).  Though you can purchase products individually, it's their multiple boxed sets that are really the big sellers.

While browsing the site, the #EyeLove Box immediately got my attention.

This particular set contains one of each of the following products:
    -Soothingsista X Memebox #eyelove eyeshadow quad
    -I'm Lip Crayon #06 Bella
    -I'm Cream Blush #05 Emma
    -I'm Eyeliner #01 Night
    -I'm Eyebrow Mascara #01 Brownie
    -Mememask

The box is valued at just under $50. But because the brand is so incredibly awesome, you can get it for $35! Pretty fab deal right?

Make sure to take a gander at the rest of the site; I promise that you'll fall in love with practically everything on there.

Happy shopping!

Tuesday, March 17, 2015

Got the Winter Blues? Throw on a Colorful Scarf!



Without a doubt, March is basically the most depressing month of the year (sorry, ladies...just tellin' it like it is). It especially sucks in New England. We're over the whole snow thing, and all we want is to be able to bust out our fave brightly colored dresses without freezing.

Alas, it's still a bit too chilly for that. But there are certain accessories that you can sport with your drab winter clothing to add a nice pop of color.  Lightweight, colorful scarves are crazily versatile, and while they look fabulous with anything; you can even use them as a transition piece to wear from season to season. Personally, I think that scarves are the best accessory for changing up any look.  They have the power to spruce up almost every outfit.

The scarves pictured above are the Cotton/Modal Scarves from Banana Republic.  I absolutely love them! They're super chic, and the hues that they're available in are really perfect. Of course, the pink one is my first pick, but the teal one adds such a great pop of color as well. If you're a little scared to try something so bold, the off-white option is perfect for you. Even though it's a "safe" color, it still has the ability to change up your look. I want all three!

The great thing about scarves is that they're so incredibly versatile. You can wear them in countless ways, all of which look stylish and absolutely gorgeous.  Depending upon how you layer it, a scarf can add edge, frivolity, elegance, femininity or an air of bohemia.

There are four basic ways to wear a scarf (though there are probably hundreds of other options). Here's a little cheat sheet to help you mix up how you wear your scarf:
  1. Classic: Knot a smaller square scarf at the neck
  2. Fashion-y: The effortless pull through
  3. Easy Glamour: Wear the scarf dripping languidly down the body (BTW, If you're having a "fat day", this is a great way to hide the bloat!)
  4. Laid Back: Do the "loop and tuck" by wrapping the scarf around your neck twice and tucking the remaining bit pieces underneath
Each of the scarves pictured above can be found at Banana Republic and they retail for about $60. I think the price is right, considering all the wear you can  get out of them. Spending a little more on accessories like this is usually a good idea--skimping on a scarf tends to look cheap. Plus they usually aren't nearly as comfy!

Happy shopping!

Wednesday, March 11, 2015

Fashion Faux Pas: This "Tunic Maxi Dress" Looks an Awful Lot Like a Muumuu...

It doesn't matter what you call it--a muumuu is a muumuu. It could be marketed as a stunning, glamorous dress that's both comfy and chic, and beneath the lies, it would still be one of the most unfortunate pieces of clothing ever to exist.

Much as I hate them, I can understand certain women wearing muumuus on occasion.  An older lady (like my fabulous Great Aunt Alma, who wears brightly patterned ones as comfy nightgowns), a pregnant gal, and of course anyone who is extremely overweight and just wants ANYTHING to fit has my permission to go forth with it.

That said, no one else should be caught wearing something like this. Sadly, one of my fave stores, Forever21, has a High-Slit Tunic dress just in time for spring.

I have so many problems with this.  First of all, the "tunic" (which I'm just going to start referring to as a muumuu or dress since that's what it is), honestly looks like a shapeless tent of fabric.  Possibly made from some ugly curtains. Because it has no shape whatsoever, the dress just hangs there and doesn't flatter ANY body type.  Even the gorgeous model can't pull off the look! My number one rule when it comes to fashion is that if the model looks like crap, chances are you'll look ten times worse.

Since the cut isn't doing any favors, you'd think that at the very least the length would be spot on.  But no! The dress is simply cut off right in between the knee and the ankle. Anything that length makes almost everyone look shorter, as it cuts the line of the leg right in the middle of the shin.

The only thing the muumuu's got going for it is the price. Each one is under $30 (and rightfully so!)

Regardless of the "great deal", I swear that if I ever see anyone wearing such a garment in public I will probably get extremely violent and then puke all over your precious dress. Just a little warning. 

That is all.

Tuesday, March 10, 2015

Get Your Skin Back to Gorgeous with InstaNatural!



Since I have such ridiculously sensitive skin, I'm always interested in trying out different products.  My thinking is, if a product works on me, it'll work on anyone!

That's definitely the case when it comes to the products I recently tried from InstaNatural. I was sent three different products to review and so far so good! With skincare products, I find that it usually takes a few weeks (I'm sure the InstaNatural brand agrees), to see full results.  That said, I did notice some benefits to the products I tried.

The InstaNatural Vitamin C Serum ($16.75) was what I went for first.  I've tried products that contained Vitamin C in the past, and didn't have a horrible reaction to it, so I figured I was good to go! As expected, this product, thankfully, did not irritate my skin. Vitamin C is one of those ingredients that does a crazy amount of fabulous stuff for your skin, no matter what your skin type is. This product is mainly marketed as an anti-aging serum, which I'm sure it works great as, but I was personally impressed with its ability to hydrate my super dry skin. I also found that the serum added some much-needed glow to my pasty completion, which is much appreciated!

Next up was the InstaNatural Youth Express Eye Gel (19.95). I do tend to worry about my eyes quite a bit, and unfortunately not very many products have worked on the super sensitive skin around my eyes. But I was definitely curious. After use, my skin felt fine (huzzah!) and I had no negative side effects from the product.  I'm pretty sure that the fact that the gel contains hydrating ingredients had a lot to do with that. After using the gel for about a week, I noticed that the skin around my eyes was just...better. One thing I definitely noticed was that applying makeup was much easier. I do have tiny little wrinkles starting around my eyes, as well as dry skin, and this product helped out with both of those issues and made my skin smoother.

Finally, I have to say that I was incredibly excited to try out InstaNatural’s Advanced Repair Scar Gel ($24.95). Because I'm so pale, every little scratch has the ability to turn into a clearly visible scar. It can be very frustrating. This product works by softening the texture, as well as the color, of scars and speeds up the healing process. It works on all scars--new and old. It does take a bit of time to see a noticeable difference, so I can't say that I had scars disappear over the course of a week. I did, however, notice that the skin around said scars is much softer, and is starting to look a little more even. I have a feeling that I'll be using this for a while and I'll be sure to update you after a month or so!

All of the products I tried are great, and I imagine the rest of the InstaNatural line is just as spectacular.

Happy shopping!

Disclosure: This post contains a sample product sent for review consideration. My priority is to you, and I honor that commitment by being honest! If you have any questions about this, please email me. 

Monday, March 9, 2015

Fab LancĂ´me GWP Just in Time for Spring!



I'm such a sucker for anything that comes with a free gift with purchase. I will literally purchase anything to qualify for a free gift, especially if it's beauty related.

The best GWP at the moment? Belk is offering up a super gorgey LancĂ´me GWP that includes many of their popular products. The best part is that you actually get to choose which products the gift includes (to a point), so you'll get a great customized beauty set made just for you!

Spend $35 or more on any LancĂ´me products, and you'll get this GWP containing the items below:
  • Choose your serum: New Visionnaire LR 2412 4%-Cx Advanced Skin Corrector or Genifique      Concentrate
  • Choose your night moisturizer: Renergie Lift Multi-Action Night, Bienfait Multi-Vital Night, or Absolue Premium Bx Night
  • Lipstick
  • Blush
  • Bi-Facil
  • Definicils Mascara
  • Choose your cosmetic bag: Stripe, blue, or pink
  • Free shipping
Per usual, I'm drooling over the super cute cosmetic bags. That said, I think it's safe to say that once I receive this GWP, all of the products will be used. Multiple times.

Now, it's incredibly easy to spend $35 on LancĂ´me items. Their beauty picks are fabulous.  But if you're looking for something new and pretty to try for Spring, they've got an adorable Blush in Love compact that gives skin a fresh, glowy look. Each compact is $49 and the quality is simply amazing.  Plus, you can't deny that the compact itself is elegantly and gorgeous! You can choose from one of two colors (each hue is meant to work for multiple skintones). The lighter shade is Pommettes D'Amou, while the darker color is Peche Joue-Joue.

Even if you're not a huge fan of the blush, don't fret! There are still plenty of LancĂ´me beauty options to pick from.

This particular GWP is valued at $115 (!!!) and you can get it in stores or online while supplies last.

Saturday, March 7, 2015

I FINALLY Jumped on the Curling Wand Bandwagon!

The AMAZING wand!
Since I have naturally wavy hair, I never really felt the need to try out curling wands when they first came out. A while back, I randomly received a CHI Air Texture Ceramic 1-inch Curling Wand to try out, and luckily I was just the right amount of bored to give it a go.

Ummm...this is now quite literally my fave styling tool. Ever.

Originally I assumed that in order to curl my hair, I'd need to first flat iron my super frizzed out afro-esque mess atop my head. That seemed like a lot of work. So before going crazy and spending hours doing that, I decided to just try using the wand on my already wavy 'do. Since I wasn't really planning on using the wand beforehand, I had already applied a few curling products to my locks, including a volumizing spray gel.  I think that actually helped and in the future I'll always throw some gel in my hair before curling it. It really seems to hold the shape.

My hair post curling
My original plan was to just curl a few front pieces to get the general idea. But I absolutely loved the way the curls looked, so I ended up clipping sections back and curling each individual chunk. It didn't take very long, as you can wrap fairly large sections around the wand at a time.  Since the heat goes over the 400 degree mark, holding the curl in place for a couple seconds is really all it takes. Once the strand is released, you end up with gorgeous, loose curls that look perfectly styled while appearing to have a bit of an "undone" look that's all the rage this season.

To finish it off, I only added a light layer of hairspray. The gel held everything in place, so there really wasn't much more to do. And the curls lasted all day without any touch-ups!

I just can't get over how amazing this tool is! How did I manage to get through life without such a thing?! My natural waves are halfway decent, but they're nothing compared to the beauty that is achieved with the CHI wand.

Currently, each wand retails for about $60. I think it's a pretty great deal, considering how fabulous it makes all hair types look!

Thursday, March 5, 2015

Leopard Print + a Pink Studded Bow = ONE AMAZING HANDBAG!

Betsey Johnson is probably my all-time favorite designer. I absolutely love her whimsical designs, especially when it comes to accessories.

Her handbags are always fabulous. I own quite a few, and I love how timeless, fun, and gorgeous they all are.

My latest handbag crush is this Betsey Johnson Bow Tie Shopper in Leopard Print.  Yes, the bag comes in other colors, which are also cute, but this one just calls my name!

If I were a purse, this one would be it. It really looks like me in purse form. It's got everything I love: leopard print, pink details, studs, and even a big bow. What more could a girl ask for?!

These specific colors surprisingly work together making the bag super neutral; it can be worn with nearly any outfit.  It's also got a bit of  bad girl edge to it, which is softened up a bit by the pink hue and the bow. Size-wise, the handbag is fairly large--you can easily fit all of your must-haves in this satchel. It's really just the perfect bag.

Each one retails for $118. That might seem a bit pricey, but this is the type of bag that never goes out of style and will be used a lot!

Happy shopping!

Tuesday, March 3, 2015

How to Look 10 Years Younger


I'm just going to throw it out there: I'm almost 30.  I know, I know...it's not really a big deal since 40 became the new 30 and 30 became the new 20.  But I still look for tiny wrinkles (which I am starting to get), and search for ways to hide my age.

I found some fab makeup tips that really make a difference for any age. Follow these tricks, and I promise you'll look at least 10 years younger:

1. Lift your brows-- High, full brows look youthful and help define all your features. Use a brow powder or pencil that's a shade lighter than your hair color to fill in sparse areas, then sweep a fine line right above the top of the arch. Try Wet n Wild's Color Icon Liner Brow & Eye Pencil.

2. Camouflage crows feet-- Forget about heavy cover-up--it makes lines more obvious. Instead, brighten the area with concealer under the outer third of your lower lashes and add a creamy highlighter like Benefit's Ooh La Lift below any lines.

3. Reduce "parentheses"-- These are the most annoying lines for me. To hide the lines that run from your nose to your mouth, apply concealer one shade lighter than your skin below the fold only, not over the entire crease. This reduces the appearance of a defined edge. Try Laura Mercier's Secret Camouflage.

4. Give your pout some pep-- It's a simple fact that the sides of your mouth tend to droop with age. To lessen the effect, brush highlighter on the corners and concealer just below the outer edges of your lower lip. Try Sonia Kashuk's Synthetic Concealer Brush.

5. Get rid of a double chin-- You can have this problem regardless of age, but it does become more noticeable as you get older.  To fix this, apply a light layer of foundation or matte bronzer two shades darker than your skin under your chin.  Try Rimmel London's Natural Bronzer for the task. Make sure to blend toward your neck.

Hope these tips help! Stay fabulous, ladies!

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