Thursday, October 17, 2013

Fashion Faux Pas: Harem Pants (Yes, AGAIN!!!)

Okay, a few years ago, I started seeing "harem pants" all over the place. Of course, my sass took over and I blogged about it. Multiple times.

Am I crazy??! Why are these pants so ridiculously trendy?? Why is everyone selling them? And why do they keep getting upgrades, like "funky" patterns and drawstring waistbands??

As far as I can see, these are just poorly-cut pajama pants.

I've said this about a million times, but here are the facts:

  • The cut of harem pants make everyone look at least 10 lbs heavier. Because there is so much excess fabric around the thigh area, and because they nip in at the ankles, they simply make it look like you have a huge ass as well as have some sort of crotch issue. Like a horrifying "front ass", or something of the like. Not cute.
  • No matter what "fancy" pattern you print them in, poorly cut pants will continue to have the same effect time and time again. The print actually makes it worse.
  • A drawstring waist?? Seriously? Do I need to explain this?

The only people who should be wearing something even remotely close to these stupid clown-esque pants are older women, who want something comfy to wear around the house. And I really want to stress it when I say around the house. Because even a senile 100-year-old lady has no business running to the store in a pair of these.

So spread the world, fellow fashionistas! I do NOT want to have to write about this again. It might get pretty violent.

That is all.

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